This episode is all about cock control, including the origin of the word cock control. Did you know this term has a copyright? Ms. Erika and Mistress Olivia are joined by Ms. Hunter to talk about:
- stroking
- edging
- tease and denial
- ruined orgasm
- chastity, and more.
The ladies share their favorite stroking techniques and say that they know more about a penis than the men who are attached to the penis. Here’s a link to Spotify for Why Mistress Loves Cock Control. You can listen to this BDSM kink podcast on Spotify, Apple or anywhere you listen to your favorite podcasts.
Ms. Olivia: Welcome to The Weekly Hot Spot. Kink conversation, BDSM advice, and insight from the worlds of distance domination and phone sex.
I’m Mistress Olivia, here with Ms. Erika, and we had so much fun talking with Ms. Hunter, she’s back. Welcome, Hunter; we are thrilled to have you here again.
Ms. Erika: Yes, Hunter. Thank you so much. I had a blast over at your podcast on Thursday with Mistress and the Tramp, where I spent an entire hour in session, tormenting a little ignored pet. Your podcast was off the frickin’ chain. I loved it. I need to come back more often.
Ms. Hunter: I’m so glad you were there. You added to the fun. Of course, we are always crazy, and you added to the craziness. I look forward to seeing you again soon.
Ms. Olivia: One of the things I’m hearing from our listeners who are also callers, not everybody who listens is a caller, but those that are have said things like, “Wow, I’m learning so much about you.” I sit here and talk about the various jobs I’ve had. Yvonne said, “Miss, you’ve had an awful lot of jobs,” so I need to stop saying, “…when I did this…”
Ms. Erika: You are the Experienced Mistress.
Ms. Olivia: Yes, I am the Experienced Mistress. One of the great things about these podcasts is people hear a different side of us. People get to hear what an actual phone call can sound like.
I think when people think about phone sex, they automatically go to the sex part of it. Instead of thinking of it as a relationship or a conversation, they go right to the stereotypical part. The moans and groans and having a screaming orgasm, like the scene in When Harry Met Sally.
That is not it at all. The best phone sex I have engages the mind first.
Ms. Erika: The mechanics are almost rote. You can go through that easily and by yourself. What sparks your mind and imagination is where we get inspiration for our call with you.
Why are we talking about cock control on this podcast?
Ms. Olivia: Erika, you came up with the topic of Cock Control. Talk to us. Why did you choose the topic?
Ms. Erika: We deal with a multitude of different kinks and fun adventures. Some of them don’t even involve orgasm or cocks. But one thing is clear, our bread and butter is based on controlling the cock. And we ladies may have been controlling cocks longer than we think.
Ms. Olivia: We are also called the Enchantrix Empire. I did a blog post about an entire empire built on masturbation. It is our bread and butter.
Before we go any further, we have a request.
We are moving up the podcast charts, and ladies, I just checked, we are 116 of the sexuality podcasts on Apple.
Ms. Erika: Thank you, everyone. That’s exciting.
Ms. Olivia: I thought we were alone, telling sexy stories. It never occurred to me that people were out there listening.
Ms. Erika: I got a couple of emails from people who are not callers but listen in, thanking us for our kinky adventures on the Internet.
Ms. Hunter: That is totally awesome, and I know you are going to keep moving up. You’re so much fun! The more fun you are, the more they are going to keep listening.
Ms. Olivia: We are fun, and we’re pretty fucking raunchy.
Ms. Erika: We’re not afraid to be raunchy.
Ms. Olivia: And we’re not afraid to be real. I think when you’re talking about sex in this culture, it’s hard to be blunt or honest about sex. It is in many cultures, sure, but in our culture in particular that we are in now.
Ms. Erika: I’m very honored and proud to provide that to people—that they can talk about anything with me, and I’m not going to take umbrage. I’m not going to take personal offense. We can have an intelligent and sexy conversation about whatever is on your mind.
Ms. Olivia: Or you can say, “I just want to get off because I really have to get to work.”
Ms. Erika: Then we will ask, “How long do I have? 10 minutes to count down? Let’s go!”
Ms. Olivia: So, cock control. It’s usually longer than 10 minutes, if we’re lucky.
My interest in cock control
Ms. Olivia: I will admit, I had no idea what cock control was when I first started here. I got into phone sex as a career because I was doing it anyway. I had done it with boyfriends and girlfriends. I was doing it for free with random strangers in Literotica chat rooms and I ended up finding LDW.
LDW is the only service I have been with. I count myself very lucky that this is the only place I’ve ever been.
Ms. Erika: There’s no need to go anywhere else.
Ms. Olivia: We don’t have the horror stories other phone sex workers have, and we are very lucky about that.
In my interview with Ally, she asked me what I thought about cock control, and I had no idea what the fuck she was talking about. I said, “I don’t understand the control part of it, but I really understand the cock part of it.” I diverted the conversation to “Cocks are fabulous. Cocks are great,” and Ally started laughing. She said, “You’re good and you’re quick on your feet, but you don’t know what cock control is, do you?” I mumbled, No, ma’am, I really don’t.”
Ms. Hunter: To the corner with you!
Ms. Olivia: Yes! To the corner and put a quarter between your nose and the wall.
Did either of you understand cock control before you got here?
Ms. Erika: Well, I have been controlling cocks for a very long time and it was a deliberate activity. It’s not until I started doing this, that I put the term cock control to it. I’ve been very used to controlling lovers and boyfriends, telling them what to do in the bedroom because I learned very early on, unless I take the reins, they’re going to fumble around and hopefully will do something good for me.
Ms. Olivia: So true! Women bitch about men not knowing what they’re doing. You can continue bitching or you could be directing them to what you want and need. “Don’t use my clit like a light switch – onoffonoffonoffonff – do not do that!”
Ms. Erika: When I came here, I began to learn the psychology behind cock control. If we think about all the elements, we have been doing it since before we knew it.
Ms. Olivia: Was that your experience, too, Hunter?
Ms. Hunter: I didn’t hear the term either until I started here, but even when I started, I thought it was all about telling them how to masturbate, maybe putting them in chastity, maybe not giving them an orgasm, maybe ruining an orgasm. Then, like Erika said, I began looking at the psychology of it. Even if it was subconscious, women have been in control.
Traditionally, men ask women out on a date, and he pays for the date; he takes her to dinner, wines, and dines her in the hopes she might say yes later, but it is up to her whether she says yes or no.
Ms. Olivia: Maybe Ally coined the term cock control for something women have been doing all along.
Ms. Erika: We’ll have to do some research to find out if she did.
Who owns the copyright for the term cock control?
Ms. Hunter: She did! She tried to get it copyrighted, but they told her it was too vulgar. It might have gone through recently, so we will have to find out if that is true.
Ms. Erika: If it was Pussy Control, it would have gone right fuckin’ through.
(speaking loud and with authority) “The glorious phallus! It must not be controlled!”)
Well, guess what, buddy, we already are.
Hunter: I did have to put the copyright symbol on all the websites, so I know she did get it. It would be good to learn the story about it.
Ms. Olivia: The listeners aren’t the only ones learning things. We are, too.
When I learned what cock control was, everything about the actions became more organized. However, I still thought the goal was an orgasm. I learned that delaying an orgasm could be for days, weeks, months, or even years.
BDSM and female domination were fairly new to me. So, thinking about cock control was like discovering another part of BDSM in the dominatrix’s tool kit.
Ms. Erika: When someone goes to an in-person Domme, orgasm is rarely discussed because it’s not even on the table. You’re there for a different sort of experience. You can take care of your squirt-squirt later.
Ms. Olivia: If you’re lucky, she might put you in chastity. You might get a milking, but that does nothing for the arousal. The arousal and desire stay right up there.
Let’s talk specifics. What do both of you like about cock control?
What do women like about controlling your cock?
Ms. Erika: Cock tease is basic. We touched earlier on how women control cocks by saying yes, no, not yet, how about tomorrow, how about a massage first?
Cock control is the root of most of our play. We spent months and years during our formative years where we tease each other and there was no finishing.
I’ve learned more about the psychology of cock control and that the guys are trying to recreate that tension from earlier in their lives and want us to help them with that. There is a sort of sexual dynamite you feel from the formative years that comes with tease and delay or tease and denial. That is what we do as Mistresses for our callers.
Both sexes enjoy tease and denial, and I read in a Psychology Today article that women do that because they want to feel attractive or desired. Women want to feel in control and powerful, and having sex right away takes away some of that power.
Did you two feel similarly before you got into the business of cock control?
Ms. Olivia: I absolutely did. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to seem easy because I consider myself easy. When I was in college, I tried to pretend I wasn’t easy, but then I thought, “Fuck it. I’m horny. Let’s go!”
So I came to all of this naturally.
I did not think about the delay as cock control, but I wanted my foreplay. Women want foreplay more than men. They can cum in 3 minutes.
Ms. Erika: Or 30 seconds.
Ms. Olivia: From completely flaccid and thinking about the box scores to orgasm has to be a couple of minutes. I’ve never known a woman to cum that fast.
Ms. Erika: I can go pretty fast if the circumstances are right, but it’s better when you wait.
Ms. Olivia: If I’ve been thinking about things for a while, I can go that fast. If I’ve been thinking about what we’re going to do and he walks in, I order him, “Get undressed motherfucker and come fuck me!” He’s wondering what I have been thinking about.
Ms. Erika: “We’re going for a ride, motherfucker.”
Ms. Olivia: I read an article that talked about how women think of groups of things all at the same time, but men, when asked, are thinking, “Do I lie and not tell her what I’m thinking about? Or do I tell her the truth that I’m thinking about garlic bread?”
Ms. Erika: We are thinking about the bread, the heat, the stove, the butter melting, the laundry, the dry cleaners….” I actually don’t need to worry about any of that. I have a boy toy that I inspire to take very good care of me.
Ms. Olivia: inspired him with things like cock control!
Hunter, what do you like about cock control?
Control the cock, control the man
Ms. Hunter: I think the biggest thing is I enjoy the feeling of the power and control over the person and his cock. More than that is the creativity. Even when a guy calls and wants to orgasm in 10 minutes, I will suggest slowing down just a little. Let’s edge 2 or 3 times and then have an orgasm. They say, “You were right. That was so much better.”
Doing it this way, it is in a tiny bit of time. Imagine if the edging spans days or weeks. I like when they get it, when the light bulb goes off. They tell me how much they like it, how much better the orgasm is. They say, “When I masturbate, I just do it to cum and that’s it. An orgasm is an orgasm.”
But when he’s listening to you telling him to stroke differently, or time things differently, his body doesn’t anticipate what’s going to happen because he doesn’t even know. The orgasm has to be better.
Ms. Erika: And the poor guys. They’ve been conditioned and trained to hurry up, get that fucker off. Let’s go. You’re not supposed to be doing this. So it’s a joy to teach a man the pleasures of his own body when he has not had that ability before.
Ms. Olivia: Think about when they started masturbating. No one sat them down and said, “You have this excellent fun toy. Let’s explore it and make sure you have the enhanced user manual that goes with this fun toy.” Instead, they are told, “You get the abridged version.”
Ms. Erika: Wait a minute. These are men. Which one is reading the directions again?
Ms. Hunter: Only RTFM when we have no other choice.
Ms. Olivia: So he gets the abridged, IKEA version of the instructions in another language. He gets frustrated with it and just says, “Fuck it. I’m going to do this,” and masturbates fast and easy. After 15 seconds, he thinks that’s all there is.
No. You have put your IKEA office table upside down. There is so much more that you can do with this, ways that we can control a cock.
When I think of full cock control, I think, “Does that mean chastity?” We’re going to talk about the various ways that chastity can be done, but do either of you automatically think of chastity when you hear the words cock control?
Chastity is the ultimate in cock control
Ms. Erika: I think many do and I did until I started expanding my horizons and realized that was not the only way to control a cock.
Chastity is one way to control a cock and I think every male, whether they feel submissive or not, want to play that way or not, would do a lot of good for their mental outlook by experiencing chastity sometime in their lives. It is a good way to get to know yourself if you can put it away and say, “No.” You can put the idea away later if you don’t like it, but it has a powerful impact on the male mind. You’ve got to try it at least once with somebody you trust.
Ms. Olivia: We did a podcast that is all about chastity and our favorite chastity cage maker Mature Metal. I recommend that episode to anyone new to chastity, curious about chastity cages, etc. Erika, how long would you recommend they remain in chastity? 
Ms. Erika: For a novice, part of the excitement is picking out the cage, measuring themselves, making sure they order it correctly… all of that builds up to it. Maybe it ends up being just a day.
In my personal life, I love it. I can’t resist bringing it out to play once in a while. I use it as an aphrodisiac. I know he can’t get hard. I know he can’t go further than he is doing now. It’s exciting for me, building up over time.
The length of time in chastity can depend on his normal release. If once a week is normal, then he needs 2 or 3 weeks in chastity. If you have a guy who wanks and squirts every day, all he needs is a couple of days.
We all know guys who get addicted to chastity, and that ‘chastity high’. They want somebody who will support them and say, “You can do this. You’re fabulous.” We don’t need to coerce them. We don’t need to hold the key. They want that. They just want someone to celebrate their chastity with them. I have done it for over a year.
Doesn’t Ms. Constance have a pet who has been in chastity for over 6 years? 6 or 7 years?
Ms. Olivia: I think Ms. Constance’s pet gets released once a year, I think on his birthday.
Chastity is extreme, but there is still a gradation on chastity.
If you’ve been in chastity for two days, is that really chastity? Or orgasm delay?
Ms. Erika: It’s both, isn’t it? Once you put that penis in a cage, there’s something that goes on in the guy’s mind. The fact that he can’t get to his junk for a couple 3 days for a man ejaculating every day is a fucking long time.
Ms. Hunter: The mind goes where it normally would not go.
Ms. Erika: The point of chastity is to examine yourself and your motivators, to feel the powerlessness and vulnerability that you are beholden to another person.
If you’re delaying it for 3 days, for guys who jerk it every day, that’s a long time.
Ms. Olivia: Hunter, have you ever had someone who wanted to be in chastity and then when they were in a cage, realized, “Oh shit. This is making me crazy.” And not the good kind of chastity crazy. ”I really want out.”
Ms. Hunter: I did have someone do that. They went through everything, bought the cage, put it on and it was on for maybe an hour and he said, “Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope,” and threw the cage in the trash.
I had 2 callers who loved the idea of being in chastity, but didn’t want to really be in chastity. They don’t cum a lot. They call and edge and get off on the thought that I am going to put them in a chastity cage or see me dangling a key saying, “You may not be in a cage, but I’m still controlling you.”
These 2 guys like to stroke and edge way too much, so I don’t see chastity working for them, but they love the thought of it.
That happens sometimes. It sounds good in fantasy, but the reality isn’t what you thought it would be.
Ms. Olivia: One of the biggest things about edging is he gets JOI, or jerk off instructions. Otherwise, edging is going to go on for a boring 3 hours of up/down/up/down/up/down.
Ms. Erika: You’re putting me to sleep already.
Ms. Olivia: Remember, we are the IKEA instructions experts. We know how to put your dick together. Do you both think you understand a penis better than most men do? I do.
A Femdom often knows your penis better than you do
Ms. Erika: I have encountered men who don’t know their dicks very well. “It’s called your frenulum.”
Ms. Hunter: “My what? It feels good when I touch there.”
Ms. Erika: More importantly, how the mind and the penis interact. We stand as the gatekeeper between the two. That’s cock control.
Ms. Olivia: When we give jerk-off instructions, sometimes it’s just the instructions. Other times, do you get the sense that this might be an amazing stroke pet?
Ms. Erika: I do. Hello, Ms. Erika Owns Me; I’m talking to you.
This little slut came to me, and he just wanted to play and ask, “Please, may I cum?” but it didn’t really mean anything because the negotiation was “I give him instructions and he cums.” That’s fine. But things evolved, and now he is in chastity a lot for me.
That’s why I think JOI or guided masturbation, is a gateway kink.
Almost any man will jump on board if I say, “Heyyyy, do you want me to tell you how to stroke that dick?” They say, “Fuck, yeah!” So with that interplay, that bonding, that getting to know each other, and when you click, they’re willing to do anything for you because you’ve just brought new life to his old fucking penis.
Domination phone sex is mental viagra
Ms. Olivia: We are mental Viagra.
Ms. Erika: I saw a Tik Tok that said: The difference between a young penis and an old penis is that the young penis is like an intern, always eager, willing, and up for anything. The old penis is the CEO of the company. “This better be fucking good because I haven’t got much time.”
Ms. Olivia: Why don’t all three of us give our favorite masturbation techniques? When you’re talking to someone and think, “Oh, this is going to blow your mind. I want you to try this.”
Favorite masturbation techniques
Ms. Hunter: I have 2 things that are exact opposites of each other and guys will love one and hate the other, but they are not always the same one.
I have them squeeze their cock on the way up and then have a loose grip on the way down. Or, vice versa, loose on the way up, barely touching it, and squeeze on the way down.
I’ve found that almost no one has ever tried that. They either hold loosely in both directions or they squeeze both directions. Doing this different stroking seems like a revelation for them. Guys tend to really like one or the other of the suggestions and I don’t think they would think of that without our help.
Ms. Erika: I like the overhand, upward-only stroke. Both hands are in motion, like a relay race. One after another, go up, up, up, up, up or down, down, down, down, down. It’s harder for people to edge or orgasm going up, up, up, up, up because it’s easier to go down, down, down, down, down. That’s the thrusting motion and the natural stimulation of the penis.
That said, with a hard penis, you need lube. If you don’t usually use lube, you need a little this time. Spit in your hand if you have to. Take both your hands, palms together, fingertips touching. Now put that dick between your palms and make a fire. Roll one hand forward and one hand backward. Go all the way up and all the way down. It’s very stimulating but very hard for some to edge, which is why I like it. It’s a very teasing stroke. I call it a fire.
I like to teach my pets the names of things so when we are talking, I can say, “Okay, make a fire for me,” and I don’t have to explain things again.
Or the short vagina is another name. Put the pee hole in the palm of the hand, bring the fingers down around the shaft, and squeeze those fingers. You can twist left and right, and you can pump up and down. I call that the short vagina.
Ms. Olivia: We want our listeners to try these and tell us what you like and what you don’t like.
My personal favorite is wringing-the-towel. You have to lube, lube, lube, lube, lube… and that’s a purely selfish thing because I like to hear the sloshing with the stroking of the cock.
Ms. Hunter: It is better when you can hear it.
Ms. Olivia: Then wring the towel. Put your non-dominant hand on the base of your cock and the dominant hand, upside down, on the top of the hand that’s gripping the base. Then twist your hands in opposite directions. One hand goes one way, the other goes the other way.
Ms. Erika: Another one I like, and I like them all, I’m so selfish, is the reverse grip. I like that because it’s how I would be holding the dick if I was in front of them. My thumb and forefinger would be closest to your body in a reverse grip.
Ms. Olivia: Have you ever suggested a hand position and have a guy say, “I don’t like that.”
Ms. Erika: Or after 3 strokes changes back to up and down.
Ms. Hunter: I can’t tell you how many times that happens and of course we don’t always know unless we are watching, part of why I like watching.
If we’re doing guided masturbation, I’ll tell the guy how to do it and he’ll do it for 2 or 3 strokes and next thing you know, he’s back to what he started out doing. I will remind him of where his hands need to be and he is surprised he wasn’t still in that position. That’s why they need us.
Why he needs guided masturbation
Ms. Erika: Or they think they know that dick better than we do and that stimulating yourself is a learned response. What I love about a pet with an open mind is they are willing to try and really work to edge that cock as many times or as many ways as I wish them to. That takes time and practice, so let’s go. Here’s your homework.
Ms. Olivia: And this is homework you will not skip. You’ll enjoy it. You’ll be thinking, “Oh, 5 hours until I can do my homework.” That can be combined with jerk off instructions, but with edging, you don’t cum.
Edging can be over the course of a phone call, over the course of a week, or longer. You aren’t in chastity for a week because you are edging every day. So, 10 minutes in the morning and not allowed to cum. 20 minutes at night and not allowed to cum.
Edging and orgasm delay
Ms. Olivia: Edging is building up and you can edge for the next 2 hours and watch this porn, and that, and that. I do not give him porn to watch that will make him cum in 2 seconds. I give porn instructions like when I give jerk off instructions: “Stroke faster, then release the stroke very slowly and go back up and down. Slow down. Slower. Slower.”
It can be harder to find the right porn that will keep them going slower, but it is worth it to not send them right over the edge.
Ms. Erika: You need to know your pet, too. A lot of times, through sessions and assignments, you learn how they will react to your instructions.
I have a pet that is in chastity for me and I gave him his first assignment after he begged to be released after 6 days and I told him 100 strokes, but no cumming. Instead, he had a ruined orgasm. “Well, guess what, motherfucker, you ain’t gettin’ out now. The only stroking you’re doing is on top of that cage. How about that?”
Ms. Olivia: There are people listening saying, “What. The. Fuck? People pay her to tell them to do that?” Can you explain that?
Cure for chronic masturbation
Ms. Erika: He is a chronic masturbator and somewhat ashamed of his chronic masturbation. He knows he can do better in his life and have more time for activities if he doesn’t chronically masturbate.
Masturbation is a healthy activity, but not when it’s done to the extreme. We’re trying to retrain his brain to a more acceptable masturbation routine.
He also likes a little bit of humiliation, too, so when I had him do a recording of smacking the cage with a wooden spoon 50 times as penance for the ruined orgasm, he loved it. He was asking for it.
Am I nurturing at other times with chastity pets? Yes. And that’s the key, to know your pet and the stimuli that will motivate them to do better.
Ms. Olivia: Hunter, how do you figure out what stimuli to use?
Ms. Hunter: It comes from getting to know them, listening to their reactions.
There’s nothing more difficult than somebody who says, “I want you to give me a guided masturbation session,” and then sit there on mute the whole time. You can’t tell what they liked and what they didn’t like.
You listen to their breathing and as you have conversations, not necessarily about sex, cock control, or guided masturbation, you learn a little bit of what excites them. Maybe he tells you about the woman at work who wears short skirts and he loves to look at her long sexy legs. Then you know to throw that in when he is getting close. Sometimes, too, it is what they don’t say as much as what they do say.
Ms. Olivia: We have to be observant and listen, including listening to the spaces between the words.
Both of you talked about a ruined orgasm. A lot of our callers know what a ruined orgasm is. But some of our listeners might not know. Can you explain what it is and why you like it?
Ruined orgasms
Ms. Hunter: It is just what it sounds like. Just as he is ready to cum, he removes the stimulation. There are many ways to do that, but the bottom line is they do ejaculate, but there isn’t the amazing euphoria they get with an orgasm. They are left wanting more.
A lot of guys enjoy that because it adds to their frustration in their edging and cock control. But many get it as punishment, and it is something they want. That is something you learn in getting to know them. “Well, okay, you can have an orgasm, but only a ruined one.”
Ms. Olivia: That’s an example of Fun-ishment. Not punishment.
Ms. Erika: When we’re sexually aroused, our bodies dump a bunch of hormones into us that make us feel good and makes us do all kinds of naughty things. Like drugs and alcohol lowers your inhibitions, these hormones do as well.
Then, when we have our orgasms, it is like a jet landing when the engines go in full-reverse. That is what our biology is doing when we have a full orgasm. The feel-good hormones are in reverse so you can go about your day like a reasonable thinking human and not a gooner brain.
With a ruined orgasm, that full-stop doesn’t happen. The satisfaction just isn’t there.
I got a beautiful snippet from one of my girly sissies who just sucked her first cock for me a couple of weeks ago, sissy Nora, congratulations. We were discussing a rather hot video that I shared with her about ruined orgasms and her response was
“Mistress, nothing compares to a ruined orgasm as a symbol of ownership and delay of full satisfaction for the male. That is their place.”
That’s exactly what a ruined orgasm is. It’s our control, our ownership, and that’s what the cock’s going to do for us. And you’re going to stay horny and think about me more.
Ms. Olivia: I think of a ruined orgasm as low-calorie, fat-free chastity. It’s kind of the middle ground between the cage and all of the accoutrements, because some people don’t like the apparatus stuff of chastity, but they want to get that experience.
Chastity without a chastity cage
Ms. Olivia: So prostate milking, a ruined orgasm, or, as I call it, chastity without a cage, where I have someone masturbate with numbing cream. When they do that, the penis loses its erection, so that’s chastity for people who can’t wear a cage. This also acts like a ruined orgasm, except there is no ejaculate.
Ms. Erika: There is more than one way to experience chastity. If a chastity cage does not fit your lifestyle, with enough trust, understanding, and commitment, you can practice chastity in different ways.
Ms. Olivia: Nobody is going to go through his travel bag of toiletries. And if your wife goes through your toiletries, you can have tooth-numbing cream in there… Oragel. Your partner is never going to look and think you were putting it on your penis.
Ms. Erika: “Why is this bottle of Oragel in your bag? I didn’t know it came in a 24 ounce size. Are you going to be able to carry this on the plane?”
Ms. Olivia: Chances are your partner will not ask, “What is this for?” Even if their partner knows you masturbate, many men don’t want to admit it to their partners. If you had lube in your bag, the partner would know you masturbate.
Ms. Erika: Ladies, your guys are jerking off. There’s no 2 ways around it. Don’t pretend it’s not happening. It’s happening.
Ms. Hunter: It’s a fact of life.
Ms. Erika: 12% or so of men do not masturbate.
Ms. Olivia: How many women masturbate? Is the number equally high?
Ms. Erika: I was looking at the surveys several months ago, and we have to look at how the survey was done. I’m not a fan of looking into someone’s eyes and telling them your sexy stuff. It’s better to have anonymous surveys. So when you see a source online that says “99.9% of men masturbate,” look at the source and see how they got there.
On a Twitter poll, 12% said they did not masturbate on a regular basis. It was informal, but anonymous.
Do these Femdoms masturbate?
Ms. Olivia: I masturbate. Both of you are in committed relationships. Do you masturbate?
Ms. Hunter: Every day.
Ms. Erika: I don’t have to because I am very well taken care of, but if he’s not around or won’t be here until tomorrow, let’s go.
Ms. Hunter: We have sex almost every day, but I am also very horny. He’s told me many times that he’s only one man.
Ms. Erika: “You’re only one man, but we have 4 vibrators. Let’s go. Who said we need your penis?”
Ms. Olivia: On an earlier podcast, someone said they were going to hop on the motorbunny and ride off into the sunset.
I have always masturbated. It is independent of who I’m dating… men, women, and both.
Masturbation and phone sex
I just thought about how masturbating might be one of the things that led me into phone sex. I like being with someone, but not necessarily in the same room with them. I’m not saying I don’t like face-to-face with a person, but I like variety, and I like the auditory only or the visual only. I will often close off other avenues of stimulation and concentrate on just one.
If I’m on the phone with someone that really gets my motor running, I will lay down on the couch or the day bed in my office, stretch out, put on a sleep mask, and listen to him, talk with him, and masturbate.
A couple of times, I will ask, “Did you know I had an orgasm?” And he will say, “You got awful quiet and seemed distracted.” Oh, no! I try to keep it professional because he is paying for it.
Ms. Hunter: I guarantee if he knew that was what happened, he would think, “Oh! That’s awesome!” A lot of guys would love to say, “I gave my Mistress an orgasm.”
Ms. Erika: You’re also conditioning him to that. On another call, if you start to get quiet, it will excite him even more because he knows what’s happening on your end.
Ms. Olivia: Some men really pay attention. They pay attention like we pay attention. Not all men, but some.
I asked one caller how he knew what was going on on my end of the call, and he said I made a little gasp. I had forgotten about that until I was quite revved up and made my tiny little intake of breath. He said, “That’s the sound. You keep doing that.”
Ms. Erika: You’re giving away your secrets.
Ms. Olivia: I am giving away my secrets! Now some people will say, “I didn’t take you to that small intake of breath.” The reason for that is because you are using my clit like a light switch.
Ms. Hunter: On/off/on/off/on/off. I’m clapping it off right now.
Final thoughts about cock control
Ms. Olivia: Final thoughts?
Ms. Hunter: I love the whole idea of cock control, from the mental aspects to the physical aspects and things people might not have ever thought about. It really is a part of every fetish in one way or another.
Ms. Erika: I love all of cock control and have fallen more in love with cocks if that is possible.
There are many ways to control that cock and I would suggest guys out there to not let yourself depart from this flying blue ball without learning and experiencing how we can enhance your sexual experience.
Ms. Olivia: We do know penises better than 99% of men. There are men who have taught me a few things about handling a cock, but at this point, they are few and far between.
We are Cockologists.
Ms. Hunter: I’m going to put that on my resumé.
Ms. Olivia: Cockology… instead of Anthropology.
Ms. Hunter: Where did you get your degree in Cockology?
Ms. Erika: LDW!
Ms. Olivia: One final thought. I love the sounds, the slurping, the gasps, the moans, the begging. I think it’s good I’m doing phone sex since so much is about the sounds. Unless we are doing a Skype call, it’s all auditory. It’s the theater of the mind.
I’m going to have to take a shower after this podcast.
Before we ask the questions of the listeners, we want to remind you to go to The Weekly Hot Spot on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your podcasts, subscribe to The Weekly Hot Spot, like it, then leave a review. Thanks to all of you who download The Weekly Hot Spot on Spreaker, too. We appreciate you, and we love your questions.
Questions for fans of The Weekly Hot Spot kink podcast
Ms. Erika: Have you ever submitted control over your cock to someone else? If not, why not?
And to add to what Ms. Olivia said, be loud. Be a slut. I love it.
Ms. Hunter: If you have not given someone else control, you need to experience it. And, instead of tensing up right before the orgasm, stay relaxed. Tensing is almost like forcing the orgasm, and it’s never as good. Staying relaxed can be difficult on your own, so that’s where we come in to remind you not to tense up.
Ms. Olivia: I’m going to be selfish; I love seeing them tensing up. It looks really hot.
Ms. Hunter: I agree, but I do encourage them not to so they can experience it and see what that’s like. We talk about it later. What was different? What did they like?
Ms. Olivia: I want to know, if you are a dry stroker, what the fuck is going on? Why? I have a hard time wrapping my head, pun intended, around that. Why? I’m a liquid girl myself. I like the sloshing sounds. I just don’t understand the dry stroking.
Hunter, we have to have you back again. You are fun.
Ms. Hunter: You guys are awesome as well. Always fun with you guys. So thank you for having me.
Ms. Olivia: Thank you to everyone who’s listening. Enjoy trying new masturbation techniques, stroking techniques, and answer the questions.,
You can send me an email to Olivia@EnchantrixEmpire.com.
My Twitter is @MistressOlivia1 and my blog is Experienced Mistress.
Hunter, how do they get in touch with you?
Ms. Hunter: You can email me Hunter@EnchantrixEmpire.com.
My blog is Intelligent Fantasies and my Twitter is @EmpressHunter.
Ms. Erika: My email is Erika@EnchantrixEmpire.com.
You can find me on Twitter at @ErikaEnchantrix and my blog is Intelligent Phone Fantasy.
Ms. Olivia: Thank you to everybody for listening. I appreciate it. We are thrilled you are moving us up on the charts.
We will see you again next time. Thank you for joining us.
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