This is a 2 part post on how the Femdom ladies of LDW give dick reviews. Yes you can ask for us to give you a dick review but even if you don’t ask, just know that we each have certain things we look for in a dick pic. Here are some more of the ladies and what we like about the looks of a cock. This is a transcript of the podcast episode: How Women Rate a Dick on The Weekly Hot Spot podcast.
What does Mistress Claire look for in a dick pic for a review?
Ms. Olivia: Mistress Claire, I really want to do a 2-Mistress dick pic review with you. I think it would be a hoot. Your blog is Sassy Classy Phone Sex for a reason!
Ms. Claire: 2-Mistresses for anything, including looking at a penis, is always better than one. With you, it’s like having three.
Ms. Olivia: Aw, thank you! When I am really animated, I apologize because I’ve had a little too much coffee.
Ms. Claire: I didn’t know there was such a thing. It just makes us more on fire.
Ms. Olivia: In your experience, what do you think men want to know about what women think of their penises?
Do women lie when talking about a man’s penis?
Ms. Claire: Most women are taught to be polite, so the guy will never know if he is really getting the truth or not.
When we ask, “How big is your penis?” and they answer, “It’s big enough. I don’t get any complaints.” I respond, “That’s the best you can do? ‘You don’t get any complaints’ is not an indication whether or not she is happy with your size.”
Ms. Olivia: I think this makes the guy scared and uncomfortable because in his heart of hearts, hearing his wife or girlfriend say, “Oh, honey. It feels fine.” He knows that fine means “It sucks,” and not in a good way.
Or she will say, “I love the way you lick me. Will you finish me off right here? Use your fingers.”
I think the guy knows the truth about his dick and wants someone to say, “Let me tell you what I really think.”
Does the shape of a dick matter more than size?
Ms. Claire: Size matters, but shape is really important, too.
Ms. Olivia: This is where we are going to be reviewing, under a continuum of attributes. Size, yes, but it is also about aesthetics of the penis, too.
Ms. Claire: That’s a great way to put it.
Ms. Olivia: It’s the size of the cock head compared to the size of the shaft. Cut or uncut. Veiny or do you like it smooth? Manscaping. All of these things.
If you are looking at a penis, what are you looking for is a really attractive penis? One that makes you sit up and take notice. “Oh, my! Look at that!”
Ms. Claire: When it’s really hard and thick and throbbing and looks like it is trying to grow beyond its capacity. I usually find that in a certain size, the seven or eight inch range. The seven inch range always looks like he’s constrained. He wants to be eight inches, but is stuck in the seven-inch penis. Like he is going to bulge out of his casing.
The quality of the erection is a pretty big deal, too.
Ms. Olivia: I hadn’t thought of it that way, but what a great way to say it.
If I’m looking at a penis, I don’t care what size it is. I’m looking for aesthetics. I’ve seen some beautiful penises at 5-inches. They are fabulous. Cute.
Ms. Claire: I think, “If only you could scale that up.”
When you see those ones with the nice mushroom heads, I’m sure we all want one of those, rather than the aerodynamic pointy ones…”
Ms. Olivia: I’ve never heard them called the aerodynamic ones, but isn’t that the truth? I wonder why some guys have pointy cock heads.
Ms. Claire: I don’t know, but that mushroom head is barbed not only for my pleasure but for the guys’ as well. I feel sorry for the aerodynamics’ guys. That’s my nice way of putting it. “You’re pointy and I can’t feel it. It’s nothing special.”
Ms. Olivia: You bring up a really good point. These dick reviews are going to be an honest assessment. “Your dick looks fabulous because of this, this, and this.” “We think there could be improvement on your manscaping in this area.”
The Mistresses do not all agree. For example, Mandy said she does not like an oversized head. She wants the head at the same size as the shaft. Daphne likes the oversized head. I like the oversized head. Madison also likes the oversized head.
In this oversized head controversy, where do you fall on the head size issue?
Ms. Claire: The bigger, the better. I do like that big fat mushroom cap.
Ms. Olivia: Would you give him extra points for having that nice big mushroom cap? Maybe overlook something you do not like?
Ms. Claire: That’s a hard one because I have seen a man who is all mushroom cap and no shaft.
Ms. Olivia: Oh, yeah. If there is no shaft…
Ms. Claire: There is no point.
I am all into a mushroom head, but if there is a one-inch shaft, I’d rather have your thumb.
Ms. Olivia: Say he has a beautiful penis, a fabulous mushroom head and terrible manscaping on his balls, do you give him a pass for terrible manscaping on his balls? Or do you rate a 4-star penis and get one star taken off because you need to manscape those balls, buddy.
Ms. Claire: If they have all that wiry sticking out stuff, c’mon. I don’t need to floss while I’m down there. Especially if we’re talking about the balls. I can give those a pass with the right head.
I like trimmed. I don’t necessarily like completely shaven or waxed. I don’t really like that wild, crazy Rainforest effect, either. It holds on to smells. It tickles in all the wrong ways. I like when men keep things tidy.
Ms. Olivia: Tidy. I agree with you. I like some hair because you can tug on it, run your fingers in it. There’s so much fun stuff you can do with a little bit of hair.
I will say, completely clean-shaven does increase sensations.
Ms. Claire: If it does increase sensations too much, they can become a little trigger happy. It can depend on the guy whether that is a good thing or not.
Ms. Olivia: That is true.
Claire, why did you sign on to be part of the Dick Pic Review Team?
Ms. Claire: I’m heterosexual and I love cock. I don’t know how else to put it. I’ve seen a lot professionally and unprofessionally. I like to consider myself as a cock connoisseur.
Letting it all out, letting you know what I think, and letting you know where there is room for improvement when that’s possible is going to make things better for every woman out there.
Ms. Olivia: You are right, Claire. We are doing a PSA. A Penis PSA. A PPSA?
Ms. Claire: I’m not sure PSAs get any better.
Ms. Olivia: Tell people how to get an appointment with you to do their personal penis assessment. And get your dicks reviewed, guys!
Ms. Claire: My email is Claire@EnchantrixEmpire.com. My blog is SassyClassyPhoneSex.com and my Twitter is @ClaireEnchants. Let’s get together and have some fun!
Dick Reviews: Are you surprised at what women want?
We hope you enjoyed this 2 part series on what women really think when you send us unsolicited dick pics. The upside is that you now know exactly what to do to get a legit dick review from a Femdom and a true cock connoisseur.
Thank you for supporting our BDSM, kink podcast The Weekly Hot Spot. Remember, there are all kinds of topics and guests. If you have a question, suggestion or comment, get in touch:
Ms Olivia: olivia@enchantrixempire.com. Experienced Mistress blog
Ms Erika: erika@enchantrixempire.com Intelligent Phone Fantasy blog
We’ll see you next time and thanks for your support of The Weekly Hot Spot podcast.
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